May 9, 2017

9:01pm

Home from visiting a church to hear a brother’s testimony… ‘pushing’ to write, right now, needing to grab something to eat… don’t wanna sacrifice quality for convenience, but that’s the way the ‘leaf descends’… sometimes… Seems very mundane some days (writing), and that’s when I have opportunity to step back and check my status… motives, and ‘all that’… the motive is to practice discipline and self-control… to hone consistency while being vocal concerning the regeneration of life in me…

After confessing and repenting (turning from sins), believing Christ died for me… my life has become new… fully restored and better than…

Despite any rain that may ‘pitter-pat’ against the glass… Christ died for my sins (the atonement), I’ve accepted Him who has become the advocate for me with the Father (Creator of all things). He’s delivered me from alcohol/substance abuse and grant me liberty, through the life of His Son. In Him I’ve discovered purpose, in Him I’ve discovered truth… my testimony is true… I was as a dead man… today, I live and breathe for the hope of His return… He will not tarry… the kingdom of God is at hand…

Lord, if but one would receive the words of this testimony… and hear ‘the call’ of Your voice… I ask in the name of Your son, Yeshua (Jesus, King of Israel), that You would grant them repentance. If but one would receive You, Father, then this will not have been in vain.

Jesus, You are the true Vine…

the Way, Truth, and the Life…

He, who removes our sins as far as the east is from the west.

Thank You for that true light–

Which lighteth the world.

May 6, 2017

11:06pm

We’ve (family) sustained a steady rain for the past three hours… and we are all pretty whooped, now… but I’m not complaining… Dinner for Dad was awesome!!! Mom did one heck of a job getting everything prepared…

My brothers and I helped setup, and the youngest, and I cooked with my Dad’s mom (my Nana)… I cooked more chicken on the grill, today, than I’ve ever cooked at one time. Saw cousins today that I haven’t seen in years, literally… everyone who attended made a reflection or two in order to honor my dad. After opening the dinner with a prayer, and enjoying the powerpoint presentation mom created we fellowshipped with one another, exchanged numbers, ate cake, and food.

Today was one heck of a blessing… the best part was sharing some of what God’s done for me… with everyone in attendance… without restraint… I was a little nervous, but how could I allow the opportunity to slip past me… to be able to share my relationship with my family… Life gets better, Yo!!! Lay down your burdens… God sustains this family and everyone we meet… He is working in us… and I will keep Your word Lord… I will pursue righteousness… You know the hearts and needs of all the families we met today… thank You for keeping us, Father, receiving our praise, and hearing our prayers.

May 5, 2017

11:03pm

Just in the ‘nick-of-time’…we’ve just finished setting up for the “Big Dinner” tomorrow.

We’ve rode over to the nearest Waffle House where we’ve (self, mom, two of my brothers) (mom’s idea)… My brother– third from the top… just put that ole’ Fugees song on… (Killing Me Softly)… Promise you, the Waffle House was stupid dead before we come in, but even seems like the employees got a lil’ *head bob* going on now… God is far better to us than we will ever deserve…

It’s not bout’ any single one of us… and God is telling me, in all of this, that i’m not down here (Columbia) for me… I’m not even down here for them (family), as much as I’m down here for Him… Down here to ‘stand’… that’s it… not in a way where pressure builds or tensions increase… none of this is for what I’ve dreamed it up to ever be… but something altogether, enduring, and ultimately better…

00:22 am

Walked in house(brother’s room) just in time to see my brother (senior, state championship wrestler, choir-singing extraordinaire) fooling around with some ‘vapes'(vaporizers). I bust a u-turn and come to the living room (where I’ll be sleeping tonight…) that lil’ piece of unwarranted info. triggered a spring of emotions that…. it’s all I can do to just be sitting here and not responding to it in any manner… I can’t unknow the fact, but the immediate answer… I believe, has already been covered here, and that’s to ‘stand’… not to punch him in the forehead with the blunt end of my extra-large KJV Bible… but to trust God because He is and has always been He that is faithful… all-knowing, despite our flaws, He loves us… while we were yet sinners… Christ died for us… It is also His love and goodness that grants repentance… He did it for me, I trust His Spirit is working in the family as well.

April 30, 2017

2:53pm

What’s done is done! Cleaned up the mess we’ve accumulated over the past few months in our ‘cleaning’ closet… it was a wreck.. it looks great now… dunno’ bout’ anyone else, but it was a huge relief for me…

Upon leaving the altar this morning, *Ms. name here* (the college/young adults Sunday school teacher) come to me, and said, “I really wanted to tell you… you know, you can pray for other people.” She was not sure if I ‘knew’ that, but she wanted me to feel encouraged to do so. I completely forgot to say anything to *mentor name here*, concerning this, when I got in the car… I wish I had… I’ll have to call him some time, in a lil’bit… or not… I dunno, my usual Sunday routine has been altered to some degree… tonight’s service at the O.C. was cancelled, but my housemates invited me to come to their church… I’ve got an hour to make a decision… may stay home to do a personal study. Got pop’s birthday coming up on Tuesday and my brother’s b-day is tomorrow… haven’t gotten them anything yet, but next Saturday is my dad’s dinner and I’ve gotta’ make some arrangements to get to Columbia… thinking that I’m gonna’ work those details out tomorrow.

11:34pm

I should definitely be sleeping… the guys and I just finished a movie… in my semi-lucid state I come back to my room, my work alarm is being set, and I’m recalling the countless numbers of people we run into on the way to wal-mart around 8pm… there was literally a woman trying to stop our van as we pulled out of our house… I could tell she had just finished smoking ‘dope’…w e get up to the corner store and there’s ‘live’ action… I’m talk’in ‘traffic’… and I don’t mean Hondas and Toyotas… I’m talking bout’ dopeboys and drug-users… ridiculous… on the way to wal-mart. I know beyond the shadow of a doubt I seen three women prostituting… and all I could do was shake my head and pray… “I need Jesus”, “they need Jesus”, “We all need Jesus…”

Thank You Father for Your perfect plan, and delivering Your children from the darkness of this world.

April 28, 2017

6:13pm

See her Father?

You do;

I know.

Desire is present,

calling me as an old friend,

renewed

restored.

May I go?

I cannot go.

Can I say?

If but one word?

Look forward my son,

I am with you–

Your voice is heard

when you do pray.

Just a while

after now

the preparations are being made

sure

Where I AM

there she will be

Abide in me

without detour

Tarry a while

My son

and every good gift

I will bring.

April 19, 2017

Wednesday

6:48pm

          Spent a beautiful day at the shop constructing ‘headers’ for the houses that will commence construction in May. We got a new recruit yesterday–> one who’s intake/acceptance was maybe controversial to some, and surprise to say the least… but, is a testament to the belief ‘what door God opens, no man can shut.’ I’ve come to terms with that, and it’s a blessing to have gained the maturity to have an appreciation in God’s working in other’s lives. I’ve very little history with this man…<service is beginning now!>

8:29pm

     Service is over, service was great. We did not have our usual speaker (Pastor) today, but another man… I’d forgotten all about the revival services to take place next week… starting this sunday… our speaker tonight spoke to us regarding preparation of our hearts for revival… repentance, and new life in the church. As well as why the church needs revival for new relationships, new business, new life, increase in love expressed…

     I’m not sure what to expect at our revival meeting, but I will be praying for repentance in my heart, and a heart broken for Christ that will receive His Spirit in a new way… Thank You Father for timing and direction, bringing to surface any hindrances and walking me through the ‘letting go’, so that the way may be fruitful, and I am an effective/active member of the church.