October 18, 2017

10:44am

Out on jobsite- superintendent and coworker rode out on a Lowe’s run… I’m sitting over the trench we’ve been working in with my foot dangling over the pipe that I’m sposed to make sure the foundation guys don’t crack when they dig their ‘footer’ through the area where our pipes cross… Trash has been picked  up, tools have been organized, and come lunch time (45 minutes) I’m going to go eat… So much on my mind lately, but most stemming from self-imposed heartaches… but, so what, man up and get over it, right !? Like multiple mentors have said, this is sposed’ to be the most exciting time of my life… and it is… but, a shadow has been allowed to loom for some time now… Thank You Jesus for deliverance… and the steadfast determination to abide in it.

9:21pm

The afternoon was relatively relaxed at work… aside from the fact I forgot to strap down ladders after throwing them on the rack of company truck… not one of my shining moments…but, this moment was less about me and more of understanding the grace that was extended to me by my coworkers (not reborn) though the ladders spilled all over the highway and I was on the way home when crew-boss text me… thank YOu, Lord, for helping me to be understanding and compassionate toward my coworkers.

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October 17, 2017

5:26am

Proverbs 17:1, 9, 10, 12, 22, 24, 27, 28

Psalms 17:3, 5, 7, 8, 15!

Outreach question pg. 195 (Overcomer workbook.. Personal enrichment literature)

Note to self… work on boundaries.  I have boundaries, but I believe I use them the wrong way. Not necessarily boundaries intended to keep one from drinking, smoking, etc… but boundaries, in general, to maintain my sanity… boundaries pertaining to interactions with those in the world, mostly… I’ve got no problem speaking up, but it’s the whole art of not making a situation worse that needs fine-tuning…

12:39pm

Short time before checking out of work… God is good all the time and it won’t be but a few minutes before going to school. Day is going well… need to tighten up on the house/apt. search, though… feeling hopeful, though. I’ma see what’s happening when I get off work. Thank YOu, Father for an open door.

9:20pm

Tonight is a night that I got a sincere impulse to do wrong… allowing myself to be tugged to making a withdrawal (atm) that I had no reason to make at all. It was after 8 p.m. Four times my card refused to be read… not because money was not available… but because a connection could not be established. (to bank)_….. Even when I let go Lord, You hold me up. Please forgive me and thank You for bringing me peace, or helping me receive it, rather.

October 16, 2017

5:21 am

Proverbs- 16:7, 8, 9, 16, 17, 23, 24, 25

Psalms- 16:1, 5, 6, 8, 11

 

9:32pm

Thank You, Father, for helping me keep my heart stayed on You… every day i precisely that- a day– a day You have permitted us to awaken to, to live, to lift up our heads, our eyes, to behold Your glory… Your will be done, Father, I will trust You- by the power of the Holy Ghost… I will not return to a yoke of bondage, in Jesus name.

October 14, 2017

10:11pm

Between today and yesterday- there was a good bit of driving done- thank You; Lord, for keeping me safe and getting me to my destination safely…  I’m with the family- we’re watching t.v.- it’s been a few months since I’ve seen my parents and brothers… I’ve missed them- and this is a good feeling. I really have missed them… In the morning- we will go to church together… my mom, youngest brother, and I…

It’s interesting how God will reacquaint you with people or bring them into your life where you can see them, and they can see you, and you can be a testimony to them just by being in front of them… for example- there are places that I can simply ‘not venture’ back into because it’d be a lack of judgement on my part… but on multiple occasions my path has crossed with individuals from my past where if we’d been a minute off – we’d have never hit each other. (People that I should never or would never have ever ever ever had run back into… like, literally makes absolutely no sense whatsoever how we have crossed paths again; apart from God) Nonetheless, God has been good to us– and His timing is the only timing. Thank You Lord.

October 12, 2017

5:33am

Proverbs 12:3 – A man shall not be established by wickedness: but the root of the righteous shall not be moved.

Proverbs 12:10- A righteous man regardeth his beast- but the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel.

Proverbs 12:15- The way of a fool is right in his own eyes: but he that hearkeneth unto counsel is wise.

Proverbs 12:18- There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health.

Proverbs 12:20- Deceit is in the heart of them that imagine evil: but to the counsellors of peace is joy.

Proverbs 12:23 A prudent man concealeth knowledge: but the heart of fools proclaimeth foolishness.

Proverbs 12:25 Heaviness in the heart of man maketh it stoop: but a good word maketh it glad.

Proverbs 12:28- In the way of righteousness is life: and in the pathway thereof there is no death.

Psalms 12:5- For the oppression of the poor, for the sighing of the needy, now will I arise, saith the Lord; I will set him in safety from him that puffeth at him.

Psalms 12:7 – But the Lord shall endure for ever: he hath prepared his throne for judgement.

7:48pm

Extremely moody at the moment… just swimming in trepidation…for real… I mean, I understand that life is not what it was and I am truly overjoyed… I’m sure of the work God has done in my life… but here and now I’ve just been a little anxious due to the changes in environment with work and moving out soon… God thank You for Your goodness, mercy, grace, and faithfulness.

 

October 11, 2017

9:32pm

Definitely passed bed-time-  but shower was mandatory… went to church straight from work, and home from there… Laying down now- and the time to start on speech is way past due… a speech that’s primary purpose (self-imposed) will be to exclaim of the wonderful things that God has done in my life. The speech must adequately thank each of the individuals who played a part in grooming me to be the man I am becoming. If I can manage to deliver two lines a day then I will be making better progress than I am today… it would be more than a truth to say I am procrastinating. So, I’ve stated all of this to say that I am setting goal to start tomorrow… HA! and long term goal of 1 week to have called at least three apartment places to inquire about housing… by this time next week. As for speech- that was a joke… tonight MUST be the night… and the lines:::  The preceding months that have acquiesced to today, transpired, people I’ve met, devotions we’ve shared, there is one undeniable-indisputable fact that justifies every decision that would never ever ever ever have been made under ordinary circumstances. Decisions that were ever so subtle beckoning to turn from any life I had ever known and being instilled with the courage to do so, pursue a new life- unlike that which I have ever known… that fact is the presence of love. Love from whom God is the origin and whom He is……..{{{{to be continued}}}}}

Thank You Lord Jesus, my deliverer and Savior- You have kept me, You alone- have pursued and protected me.

October 9, 2017

5:30am

Proverbs 9:6 Forsake the foolish, and live; and go in the way of understanding.

Psalms 9:10 And they that know thy name will put their trust in thee: for thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek thee.

Lord, I need Your grace, I need Your mercy. I am skin and bone and without You I can do nothing…. thank You for leading me in the Spirit by the Spirit… in wisdom in peace in truth… a servant – a priest- that will minister Your word and not merely my own interpretations… thank You for guidance and safety this day. Your grace is sufficient.