June 24, 2016

Today was trying for me… yes it was, yes it was… confusion, miscommunication, and straight up garbage… I mean, there was the usual happenings, but from the moment I woke up I was super cranky… and irritable, steadily intent on having a good day… and yet a divide crept in and slowly parted farther and farther between myself and “that day”… I thought about leaving probably 10 times, but how could I leave with no hope of recovery and knowing that my departure originated with thoughts that were conceived due to a decision I made to have no regard for a rule. Leaving me stuck in the middle is what that lead to, fed up is what will put me gone, and fed up is what got me here… My adrenaline and added frustration mingled into a toxic blend of crap that would have driven me away, but something in me saw fit that I stay put. Instead of drinking and getting high my my anger manifest in another symptom of defect… this then drives me to hate myself and then my heart bleeds and all is lost or so it seems- the cycle is familiar and I am well aware of where the path leads and I hate failure. Anything worth having is worth fighting for… so I guess I shoot for a better one tomorrow.

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Author: clhemingwayii

How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace; that bringeth good tidings of good, that publisheth salvation; that saith unto Zion, Thy God reigneth! Isaiah 52:7(KJV)

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